


Home Again

by Rosie012



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-13
Updated: 2011-05-13
Packaged: 2017-10-19 08:27:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/198889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosie012/pseuds/Rosie012
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The fic deals with the consequences of the actions of Jack and Daniel in Scorched Earth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home Again

Home Again

 

By Rosie012

sugarfreebrownies@gmail.com  
http://rosie012.livejournal.com/  
http://rosie012.dreamwidth.org/  
http://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosie012

http://jackdanielpromptfic.dreamwidth.org/

Episodes used, Scorched Earth, Meridian, Fallen, Homecoming

 

Daniel sat anxiously on his couch in the dim light of the setting sun outside his window. He lingered over a cooling cup of coffee while a bottle of beer sat warming nearby. It was taking Jack longer than expected to make his appearance. That didn't bode well and Daniel grew more melancholy as the time ticked by.

He thought back to earlier when he and Lotan stood on the alien ship with the bomb laid out in front of them. The bomb he knew Jack had ordered to be made and would now end Daniel's life. And that was a death that would leave a stain on Jack's heart as bad as the scar that the death of his son had left.

A son and a lover both killed by his own hand with the weapons of a soldier.

Fighting was a part of Daniel's nature too. He was stubborn and opinionated and lived by his own morality that sometimes conflicted with Jack. But he knew that he'd keep fighting just the same because he couldn't stop when his passion saw a need.

He hated what he'd done as much as he knew he had to do it. Daniel saw two civilizations full of stories and struggles and a drive for survival and couldn't accept that one would have to be sacrificed to save the other. He couldn't bear to lose either of them.

But then Lotan saved the day and Daniel didn't die. He wondered if it would matter though. What had that few minutes done to his lover, thinking he'd killed Daniel in the line of duty. There would be consequences with Jack but how bad they would be he didn't know.  
Finally he heard the door open and he steeled himself for the fight to come.

Jack stood by the door a few seconds longer than normal and Daniel became increasingly uneasy about this unexpectedly slow entrance. Soon he heard measured footsteps coming toward him and he looked up into the shuttered expression of the carefully approaching man.

Jack never looked that impassive when they were alone at one of their homes. He had a very bad feeling that this particular show down wasn't going to end as they usually did. He felt a squeezing pain in his heart but he kept silent, letting Jack make the first move.

Jack glanced at the beer leaving a wet ring on the table, sat opposite Daniel, and didn't reach for it.

The silence was heavy and Daniel felt his heart pounding in his chest. The ache became so tight he rubbed his breast with a closed fist.

"I can't do this anymore, Daniel." Jack finally spoke his quiet statement of a fact. There wasn't any pain in it. Not even any regret. Daniel was beginning to realize that perhaps Jack had been pushed too far this time.

His eyes began to blur when he looked up into the inexpressive face of the man he loved. It was clear that this time it would be a lot longer before Jack came back to him.

"I'm sorry. So sorry. " Daniel watched Jack while he spoke but saw no change in his expression nor shift of his stiff back.

"I know how you must feel," he began but was stopped by the sudden explosion from his lover.

Jack flew to his feet, tension stringing every muscle as tight as a bow.

"You know something, Daniel. I think you do know how I feel." He shouted the words as he jabbed his finger in the air at his lover. When he moved close, as fast as a leaping cat, Daniel saw the pain and fury in his blazing eyes.

"Somehow that doesn't make me feel any better," Jack yelled.

"Jack," Daniel said, his hand reaching toward the man so close to him now. His heart broke when Jack pulled away not allowing the touch.

"No, Daniel. I can't do this anymore." Jack's fisted hand was pressing against his breast as Daniel's had on his own just moments ago. He was sure Jack didn't even know his hand was there.

But it turned out he did. Jack's fist opened and the flat hand rubbed his chest over his heart.

Daniel saw him stand stiffly and turn to leave. They'd been here before and they'd be here again. Daniel was sure of it, though he now knew it would take Jack much longer to get over this one.

But it turned out that Jack never came back to him. Seething anger or cold distance was a constant part of Jack from then on. Eventually there were moments of peace between them. The tension would ease a little but their relationship was never the same.

The moments of peace didn't come often enough for Daniel. And his bed, his whole apartment, grew colder with each passing month. He felt more and more lost and alone.

He never stopped fighting though. He couldn't. It wasn't in his nature to do so. Even though each fight and every moment without Jack at his side was wearing his spirit to shreds.

So in the end it was no surprise when he suddenly found his hands wrapped around a radioactive bomb that was seeping death into his body. He was terrified. He was horrified. But there was a small part of him he barely acknowledged that thought perhaps this is what he'd wanted for a long time. Life had been too difficult without Jack. He loved him still, even after all of the long months of indifference he'd gotten from him.

\-----

 

Daniel had spent many weeks wandering the town and the fields of Vis Uban. In his mind he kept seeing fleeting glimpses of a life he couldn't remember. But they would float away before he could grasp hold and make them solid. Walking the paths through the fields or the forest beyond gave him time to ponder these flashes of what he hoped was the memory of the life he had lost. Who had he been before the moment he woke up not knowing his own name? This was always his greatest question and worst fear.

In desperation there were times he would try to pull the memories out. Sometimes he dreamed about a face that was one moment solemn and the next warm and inviting. It would float toward him before being washed away like mud off his fingers when he cleaned them in the nearby stream.

On this cool day he'd been out walking for several hours. Nothing about these fields brought any memories to him today. Dispirited he trudged back through tall grasses but was stopped short when he came upon strangers dressed in odd clothes and carrying what he instantly knew were weapons. The looks of suspicion that shot his way were also filled with a kind of wonder that worried him.

He felt self-conscious. Their stares became very focused on him as though he was a terrible evil or perhaps a treasure beyond comparison. He thought the hope was more obvious in their faces.

One of them called him Dr. Jackson and he stared blankly back, giving none of his worry away. As apprehensive as he was there was now a growing excitement that he fought to control. Perhaps he would have his questions answered soon. But he hid his feelings away behind a look of suspicion. One of the soldiers turned away first and stayed ahead of the group as they escorted Daniel back into town. He heard this man call out to another man named Colonel that there was someone here he ought to see.

Colonel turned toward him looking astonished, hopeful and something more, which took Daniel by surprise. It was personal, aimed directly at him and his heart unaccountably sped up.

Another man and woman were now moving toward him and he saw awe and pleasure aimed at him. He was distracted away from Colonel and suddenly overwhelmed.

These people knew him but he had no idea who they were. This frightened him more than anything had so far.

\-----

Had there been a chance to relax at all since he had come to this place under the mountain? It had been a whirlwind of returning memories and an insane mission that had welcomed him home.

Still, he didn't feel like he was home. That couldn't be this room deep in the ground made of walls far less interesting than the rock surrounding the base probably was.

Something was missing. The bed he slept in was too big.

When he had first remembered his wife his guilt over her fate far outweighed the feelings of love he thought should be there. But he couldn't find them. Maybe too much time had passed.

He was tired. He'd help save the world, said goodbye to Jonas, who he didn't think he'd known long at all. Then he had dinner with Jack, Sam and Teal'c. Finally, after all but Jack had left he yawned his weariness and was escorted to his cement cave by this puzzling man. Jack had walked so close to him that their shoulders brushed together. Daniel said goodnight and went to bed wondering why Jack's touch was so comforting as he fell asleep.

In that twilight time when he was both awake and asleep Daniel dreamed. He knew he was in his own bed. The one he had before he ascended. He knew this place, the feel of it and the smell of it.

He could feel the sheet slide across the skin at his hip when his dream self turned onto his side. The sleeping part of him wasn't surprised to find that he wasn't alone in bed. This is where he belonged. The wakening part of him knew that he was home. He watched himself reach over and run his hand up the shoulder blade and down the arm of his bed companion.

The man started to turn towards him and Daniel fought to stay asleep to find out who it was. He couldn't see the man's face though he felt him put a hand on his arm. The bedroom started to turn gray and he fought to go back to sleep. He fought so hard he was shaking.

"Daniel," his awakening self heard Jack calling. He felt Jack's hand on his arm jiggling it to wake him up. The dream faded away and he was staring up at Jack who stood in a black t-shirt and green pants.

"Hey," Jack said smiling at him.

Daniel raised his eyebrows and tried not to look confused while he finished becoming conscious. There was something familiar about this scene, he in bed with Jack there. His eyebrows drew together in concentration while he tried to understand.

"Do I have something in my teeth?" Jack asked.

Daniel realized he'd been staring too long but he didn't look away.

His past, the past he and Jack had together suddenly slid back into place. Everything that had happened between them was emerging and stunning him. His eyes opened wide.

Jack's goofy grin faded away and he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Remembering anything?" he asked cautiously.

"You might say that," Daniel answered while pulling his arm out of Jack's hand.

Jack hung his head and took a deep breath. After a few seconds his hand crept hesitantly into Daniels and this time Daniel didn't pull away.

He was confused however, remembering that they had ended very badly. The ache of that last devastating break up in his apartment returned simultaneously with the tender loving times and it was all mixing him up. A flash of the two of them on a couch, close with their knees touching while they watched TV made his breath catch.

Jack looked up at him and Daniel was surprised to find tears falling down his cheeks. Suddenly he was grabbed into a stunning hug, then a desperate kiss that he hardly knew how to respond to. Then Jack clutched him close and muttered, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was lost. . ."

Daniel was confused. He didn't understand Jack or what was happening. He needed something, an anchor to make sense of everything. So he turned to the memory of the fading dream. He remembered happiness and feeling like he was home and knew that was where he wanted to be.

He decided to hug back so he squeezed Jack close for a few seconds. Then he struggled back out of Jack's arms and sat up. He remembered feeling this way a long time ago, heart racing, love and pain and desire all wrapped around the brown eyes and graying hair in front of him. He wanted his lover back so badly he ached. But he needed to say something before they could go on.

"I think I'm still the same person I was. I don't think I can change that."

"Doesn't matter." Jack took his hand again. "I'm miserable without you. You came back to all of us." Jack's eyes darted away and he licked his lip before turning them back to Daniel. "Now come back to me."

Daniel studied Jack's lined face, the extra gray in his hair that showed how much he had aged. He reached up to trace the line between Jack's eyes and Jack surprised Daniel by grabbing his hand and holding it against his own weathered cheek.

Jack wasn't the same man that he had left behind a year ago, Daniel realized. He had missed his lover for so long and wondered if he had visited Jack while he was gone.

Daniel leaned up to put his hands on Jack's shoulder, his face inches from Jacks. "Are you going to be able to handle me?" He smiled while he asked such a silly question though it meant so much to their future.

Jack scowled. "No." He pulled Daniel close and kissed him hard.  
Daniel returned the kiss then pushed Jack away.

"We're on base, Jack." He stated this more curious than alarmed because he remembered how careful Jack always was.

"You aren't being monitored anymore. I'm pretty sure you're you." Jack smirked.

"Oh." Daniel pulled Jack down on top of him into another kiss.

He broke away from the kiss and warned, "Don't break my heart again."

Jack rolled fully on top of him and said, "I can't promise that. But I'll do my best."

Daniel opened his legs and Jack slid into place. They pressed against each other and Daniel gasped in surprise, blinking rapidly.

"First time I've felt that for a while," he said in a puff of air.

Jack chuckled. "First time of many," he growled diving back in for more kissing.

Daniel moaned and clutched onto his returned lover's back before breaking their kiss.

"How much time do we have?" he pleaded.

"None." Jack dropped his forehead against Daniel's. "We're due at a briefing."

"Oh." Daniel groaned again when Jack ground against him.

"Wanna move out of here?" Jack asked.

"Got nowhere to go," Daniel whispered.

"Yeah, you do." Jack answered certainly.

"Okay." Daniel unwound his hands from around Jack's neck. He moaned and rolled his eyes in frustration while Jack pushed up with his arms to get off of him. It had brought their groins tightly together again.

Jack laughed, got up and reached down to give Daniel a hand up.

"Find time today to get packed." Jack ordered him.

Daniel gave a great big smile and happily said, "I'll do that. And I'll be ready to go home."


End file.
